The semester is almost over, and soon I will not be required to crochet anymore. So will I? I think the answer is yes. However, I don't see myself getting into it much more than I have for quite some time, and I will probably take a bit of a break from it to begin with. This will mostly be due to the fact that it's getting nice out and there is no way you will find me sitting inside crocheting little monsters when I could be throwing a frisbee or going on a hike. However, I feel that I have benefited from my new occupation and am glad for what I've learned. I feel a sense of pride when I look at little Glenita, and I would like to to make more things as to foster that successful feeling. I've also had fun with it, and because of the endless options for crocheting, I know that there will always be something new and fun I could make.
This being said, I really don't know how to apply crocheting to the concept of hope discussed by Spencer, Davidson, & While (1997). In the article, hope is defined as "a general state of positive belief about the future." So how does that relate to crocheting? My feelings about hope run very deep and are connected to my strongest fears, dreams, sentiments, and values. But crocheting is a pretty superficial activity in comparison with others which mean so much more to me. The activities which I find great meaning in are intertwined with those emotions which I associate with hope. For example, I find great meaning in the occupation of baking because my mother is a wonderful baker and I hope to be as good as she is someday. No just so that I can bake well, but because my mom is also my hero and my role model. I want to be just like her in every way. That is where my hope lies, and it can be connected with the occupation of baking. But crocheting? As much as I have enjoyed my experience learning to crochet, that deeper meaning is still lacking; therefore, so is the hope. I would like to continue crocheting, but I don't think I hope for it.
Hope has almost a sacred essence in my mind. It is so much more than just a desire for future events. It is what you dream to become and how you wish others to speak of you when you're gone. It is the way you envision your heart. Is it hard, cold, numb? Or is it large and strong, beating loudly, with purpose, and filled with all the love you can possibly possess? Hope is kindness, because you long to instill a desire for a better tomorrow in the lives you touch. Hope is faith - a faith in yourself, in others, in yesterday, in God, in peace, in trust... in anything. Hope is love - a love for every good thing. It is a love which holds beauty... and is alright with letting everyone else have some. A love which none of us deserve, but it's what we are meant to feel. It heals. It supports. It binds. It gives. It smiles, and makes my hearts smile too.
Maybe I'm just a little girl, naive to so much of what is out there. But, no matter what, no one deserves to be without hope.
“Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.”
― Emily Dickinson
Be hopeful, and never forget.
Yours Truly
Spencer, J., Davidson, H., &White, V. (1997). Helping clients develop hopes for the future. The American Journal of Occupational Therapy, 51, 191-198.
Monday, April 29, 2013
Monday, April 22, 2013
Intrinsic rewards
Glenita the monster is practically complete. She is now stuffed and her legs are finished! I'll probably be finishing just in time for the end of the semester. Couldn't have planned it any better!
After watching the video "Half Man, Full Life," I've decided to relate it to the concept of intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. The film highlighted the life of Jessie, a man who was born with lumbosacral agenesis. This mean that the lumbar section of his spine was missing and his legs and the nerves in that area of the spine never fully developed. The legs he was born with were eventually amputated and he was forced to function by walking on his hands or with the use of a wheel chair. Despite his physical handicap, Jessie never let it get him down or keep him from participating in anything and everything he ever wanted to do. Starting two businesses, installing satellite dishes, dating and marriage, fatherhood, swimming, and several other endeavors were never too impossible for Jessie to pursue. His life is an extraordinary example of not giving up and making the most of what you have. Jessie stated, "I'm not handicapped; I just don't have any legs."
In my opinion, Jessie is completely full of intrinsic motivation for the occupations he participates in. His determination and enthusiasm for life come from within himself as he seeks to find self-fulfillment through what he does and doing it well despite his disability. I believe that if more people were like Jessie and lived their lives to the fullest in spite of the challenges they face, many problems would be solved and people would be more satisfied as they experienced the intrinsic rewards brought about by such a good attitude. Intrinsic motivation and rewards are highly important for a satisfactory life. When I grow up, I want to be like Jessie.
After watching the video "Half Man, Full Life," I've decided to relate it to the concept of intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. The film highlighted the life of Jessie, a man who was born with lumbosacral agenesis. This mean that the lumbar section of his spine was missing and his legs and the nerves in that area of the spine never fully developed. The legs he was born with were eventually amputated and he was forced to function by walking on his hands or with the use of a wheel chair. Despite his physical handicap, Jessie never let it get him down or keep him from participating in anything and everything he ever wanted to do. Starting two businesses, installing satellite dishes, dating and marriage, fatherhood, swimming, and several other endeavors were never too impossible for Jessie to pursue. His life is an extraordinary example of not giving up and making the most of what you have. Jessie stated, "I'm not handicapped; I just don't have any legs."
In my opinion, Jessie is completely full of intrinsic motivation for the occupations he participates in. His determination and enthusiasm for life come from within himself as he seeks to find self-fulfillment through what he does and doing it well despite his disability. I believe that if more people were like Jessie and lived their lives to the fullest in spite of the challenges they face, many problems would be solved and people would be more satisfied as they experienced the intrinsic rewards brought about by such a good attitude. Intrinsic motivation and rewards are highly important for a satisfactory life. When I grow up, I want to be like Jessie.
Monday, April 15, 2013
"Love each other or die"
Glenita is almost finished! Really I just need to stuff her, finish the legs, and attach the arms and ears. It really has gotten easier to do as time has gone on. I can sit and watch a TV show while doing it and not have to concentrate hardly at all. I plan to continue crocheting as times goes on and hopefully expand on the skills I've learned.
Watching the video Morrie: Lessons on Living was very enlightening, and it evoked within me a deeper side of what it means to live. Often I think that as long as I'm surviving, I'm living. No matter how thinly stretched I become, no matter how bored I can get, and no matter how inadequate I feel, I often convince myself that I'm doing just fine as as long as I am pushing through and surviving, I'm living. WRONG. Do you know what it means to live? Really live? Morrie does. And I thought I did. I guess I'm finding that I'm not young enough to know everything anymore.
As Morrie was facing death every single day, he gained so much wisdom and insight as to the meaning of life. Part of that meaning was made evident in the way he talked about his occupations, and how he would feel when he was no longer able to do them. The way he saw it, life wouldn't be worth living if he couldn't continue doing the things that made him who he was. In his disease, ALS, the movements of his hands and his ability to use his voice would inevitably become extinct. As Morrie contemplated this, he stated, "What will I do without control of my hands? I'm a Jewish man! I talk with my hands. I use certain words and inflections. Who will I be when they are gone?" Also, in contemplating the fact that he would become unresponsive at some point, his comment was, "When that is gone, Morrie is gone." This makes clear the connection between occupation and identity. Morrie felt that the loss of his voice and hands would impair his ability to fulfill his role in the Jewish culture, and even the very core of who he was. In his mind, it would be better to "continue to live by ceasing to live."
Morrie highlighted seven points to keep in mind throughout life and the dying process. These are:
1) Talk about it
2) Accept it
3) Keep an open heart, and continue to open it
4) Be involved and aware
5) Be compassionate to yourself and others
6) Treat yourself gently; be kind to yourself
7) Take responsibility for yourself
This is what living is. This is what meaningful occupation facilitates. This is why we're here. I want to just share a few of my favorite quotes from the movie:
"Interaction, relationships, and love keep me alive."
"Maybe the distance between life and death isn't as great as you think."
"[Life] is only a little bridge across a small river."
"Don't let go of things too soon, but don't hold on for too long. Find the balance."
"You're not a wave; you're just part of the ocean."
"There will be much love passing between us. You don't need speech or hearing for that."
"I have no shame. My dignity comes from my inner self."
"Love each other or die."
Through Morrie's example, we can see the potential impact we may have on the world. My thoughts turn to the recent bombing at the Boston Marathon. There is tragedy and heartache everywhere we turn. Don't let it consume you. Don't become a part of it. When you see an opportunity, take it. When there is a friendship to be made, make it. When there is love and joy to be shared, share it. Life really is just a little bridge over a small river. Don't take a single step for granted. And above all, take each step with gratitude, hope, courage, and the fullest heart you can muster. Just love, because that is living.
Yours Truly
Watching the video Morrie: Lessons on Living was very enlightening, and it evoked within me a deeper side of what it means to live. Often I think that as long as I'm surviving, I'm living. No matter how thinly stretched I become, no matter how bored I can get, and no matter how inadequate I feel, I often convince myself that I'm doing just fine as as long as I am pushing through and surviving, I'm living. WRONG. Do you know what it means to live? Really live? Morrie does. And I thought I did. I guess I'm finding that I'm not young enough to know everything anymore.
As Morrie was facing death every single day, he gained so much wisdom and insight as to the meaning of life. Part of that meaning was made evident in the way he talked about his occupations, and how he would feel when he was no longer able to do them. The way he saw it, life wouldn't be worth living if he couldn't continue doing the things that made him who he was. In his disease, ALS, the movements of his hands and his ability to use his voice would inevitably become extinct. As Morrie contemplated this, he stated, "What will I do without control of my hands? I'm a Jewish man! I talk with my hands. I use certain words and inflections. Who will I be when they are gone?" Also, in contemplating the fact that he would become unresponsive at some point, his comment was, "When that is gone, Morrie is gone." This makes clear the connection between occupation and identity. Morrie felt that the loss of his voice and hands would impair his ability to fulfill his role in the Jewish culture, and even the very core of who he was. In his mind, it would be better to "continue to live by ceasing to live."
Morrie highlighted seven points to keep in mind throughout life and the dying process. These are:
1) Talk about it
2) Accept it
3) Keep an open heart, and continue to open it
4) Be involved and aware
5) Be compassionate to yourself and others
6) Treat yourself gently; be kind to yourself
7) Take responsibility for yourself
This is what living is. This is what meaningful occupation facilitates. This is why we're here. I want to just share a few of my favorite quotes from the movie:
"Interaction, relationships, and love keep me alive."
"Maybe the distance between life and death isn't as great as you think."
"[Life] is only a little bridge across a small river."
"Don't let go of things too soon, but don't hold on for too long. Find the balance."
"You're not a wave; you're just part of the ocean."
"There will be much love passing between us. You don't need speech or hearing for that."
"I have no shame. My dignity comes from my inner self."
"Love each other or die."
Through Morrie's example, we can see the potential impact we may have on the world. My thoughts turn to the recent bombing at the Boston Marathon. There is tragedy and heartache everywhere we turn. Don't let it consume you. Don't become a part of it. When you see an opportunity, take it. When there is a friendship to be made, make it. When there is love and joy to be shared, share it. Life really is just a little bridge over a small river. Don't take a single step for granted. And above all, take each step with gratitude, hope, courage, and the fullest heart you can muster. Just love, because that is living.
Yours Truly
Monday, April 8, 2013
Intrinsically, utterly, fabulously, autonomous
I made some good progress this week! Glenita now has a face, ears, and arms! She is so cute! In order to do this I had to learn how to crochet in a circle, which was hard at first but then I got the hang of it and was whipping out ears and arms left and right. I can't put them on her until after I stuff her, and I can't do that until I'm ready to do the legs. I considered putting up a picture of her face, but I'd rather leave you in suspense :)
This week we discussed how different types of motivation can affect a person's well being and occupational performance. I think I can best relate my crocheting experience, and really any occupation I engage in, to the section of the article regarding the additive or un-additive concept of intrinsic and external rewards. This is kind of how I understood it best. So if I engage in an occupation which gives me 10 hypothetical points of intrinsic meaning, then all of the sudden am offered 5 points of extrinsic reward for doing it, my sense of satisfaction does not add up to 15 points. What happens is the intrinsic motivation goes down to 5 points, the extrinsic reward makes up the other 5 points, and I still only have 10 points of motivation and satisfaction in that occupation. With this understanding, one can understand the phenomenon of how increasing extrinsic motivation will decrease intrinsic motivation. Extrinsic motivation is not only limited to rewards, but also punishments, deadlines, threats, and surveillance. This is where I related the most to the article. In my crocheting, in the beginning it was harder to enjoy and find satisfaction when I had to crochet because I had to have something to report. My intrinsic motivation was decreased because the extrinsic factors were more demanding. This is not just the case with crochet. I've been this way my whole life. If my mom ever told me that I should go get some exercise, there was no way I was going to do it. It had to be my idea. If my dad told me to make my bed, I did it very grudgingly or avoided doing it at all. I was never too much of a trouble child with larger issues, but the little things bothered me. I want to do something because I want to do it and I find it intrinsically rewarding, not because it's expected by anyone else. I hate feeling pressured or controlled.
Intrinsic motivation is very important to me and my occupational performance and success. With intrinsic, or autonomous, motivation, one is given a choice as to what occupations they engage in and their volitional components are increased and benefited. This has been a very large part of my endeavors and goals. I choose what I want to do and how to do it, and I do it because it has meaning to me personally. I feel I have found more intrinsic motivation and meaning in crochet as I have continued learning the skill, and the extrinsic reward is not so dominant anymore. I mean, of course I still want a good grade, but I actually have begun to like doing it just for the satisfaction it brings. It's a refreshing and great feeling to engage in something just because it makes you feel good about yourself. Finding intrinsic meaning in our occupations can do that. Sounds a lot like what OT's do, doesn't it?
Yours Truly
Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2008). Facilitating optimal motivation and psychological well-being across life's domains. Canadian Psychology, 49, 14-23.
This week we discussed how different types of motivation can affect a person's well being and occupational performance. I think I can best relate my crocheting experience, and really any occupation I engage in, to the section of the article regarding the additive or un-additive concept of intrinsic and external rewards. This is kind of how I understood it best. So if I engage in an occupation which gives me 10 hypothetical points of intrinsic meaning, then all of the sudden am offered 5 points of extrinsic reward for doing it, my sense of satisfaction does not add up to 15 points. What happens is the intrinsic motivation goes down to 5 points, the extrinsic reward makes up the other 5 points, and I still only have 10 points of motivation and satisfaction in that occupation. With this understanding, one can understand the phenomenon of how increasing extrinsic motivation will decrease intrinsic motivation. Extrinsic motivation is not only limited to rewards, but also punishments, deadlines, threats, and surveillance. This is where I related the most to the article. In my crocheting, in the beginning it was harder to enjoy and find satisfaction when I had to crochet because I had to have something to report. My intrinsic motivation was decreased because the extrinsic factors were more demanding. This is not just the case with crochet. I've been this way my whole life. If my mom ever told me that I should go get some exercise, there was no way I was going to do it. It had to be my idea. If my dad told me to make my bed, I did it very grudgingly or avoided doing it at all. I was never too much of a trouble child with larger issues, but the little things bothered me. I want to do something because I want to do it and I find it intrinsically rewarding, not because it's expected by anyone else. I hate feeling pressured or controlled.
Intrinsic motivation is very important to me and my occupational performance and success. With intrinsic, or autonomous, motivation, one is given a choice as to what occupations they engage in and their volitional components are increased and benefited. This has been a very large part of my endeavors and goals. I choose what I want to do and how to do it, and I do it because it has meaning to me personally. I feel I have found more intrinsic motivation and meaning in crochet as I have continued learning the skill, and the extrinsic reward is not so dominant anymore. I mean, of course I still want a good grade, but I actually have begun to like doing it just for the satisfaction it brings. It's a refreshing and great feeling to engage in something just because it makes you feel good about yourself. Finding intrinsic meaning in our occupations can do that. Sounds a lot like what OT's do, doesn't it?
Yours Truly
Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2008). Facilitating optimal motivation and psychological well-being across life's domains. Canadian Psychology, 49, 14-23.
Monday, April 1, 2013
Apparently I died of boredom
Back to blogging again! Joy. Well, I know it's been two weeks, but little Glenita is just the same as she was last time. As I went to visit Grandmother in the mountains and glue myself to my computer in an effort to finish my capstone, Glenita sat lonely here in Pocatello, still just with little stumps for her legs. I guess I could have taken her with me, but it's hard when you don't know what to do next and you're relying on another individual for the information to move forward. Our schedules just haven't meshed well lately and I'm stuck. We'll have to make it happen this week.
The topic for this week is boredom. The article never really did give a clear definition for what boredom was; it only said that it is a poorly understood phenomenon. So, that left me wondering what it means to be bored. I found a quote by Leo Stein which says, "Boredom is an emptiness filled with insistance." This study on boredom related in the article stated that boredom for many people was "an extremely unpleasant feeling, possibly worse than any other." Really?? I found that interesting. Some said that it caused life to lose all meaning and purpose. I think we've got some extremists on our hands. However, I would agree with the description of boredom coming as a result of stress, agitation, restlessness, and entrapment, combined with lethargy. Along with these feelings, boredom was also described as an inability to attend or focus. This description perfectly describes my experience of working on my capstone this past week. But was I bored? I wouldn't have said so, but now I don't really know.
The song, "Flowers on the Wall" by Dailey and Vincent is a good example of boredom. If you're interested, here are the lyrics:
I keep hearin' you're concerned about my happiness
But all that thought you're givin' me is conscience I guess
If I was walkin' in your shoes, I wouldn't worry none
While you 'n' your friends are worried about me I'm havin' lots of fun
[Chorus:]
Countin' flowers on the wall
That don't bother me at all
Playin' solitaire till dawn with a deck of fifty-one
Smokin' cigarettes and watchin' Captain Kangaroo
Now don't tell me I've nothin' to do
Last night I dressed in tails, pretended I was on the town
As long as I can dream it's hard to slow this swinger down
So please don't give a thought to me. I'm really doin' fine
You can always find me here, I'm havin' quite a time
[Chorus]
This song most related to the portion of the article addressing strategies to overcome boredom. It states that the most common method used by people trying to overcome boredom was trying to find alternative things to do. Me? I tend to make food, clean, or dink around on my guitar when I'm bored. Not that I have any time to be bored. I'm in grad school for goodness sake.
Out of sheer curiosity and because I had no idea what it was, I actually went and looked up Captain Kangaroo on YouTube. If I had to describe it, I would have said it was like the '70's version of Mr. Roger's Neighborhood, and I'd argue that one would have to be pretty blasted bored to sit and watch it. However, interestingly enough, the little clip I watched included a bunch of stuffed animal puppets riding on a bus singing a song which I felt could easily be related to boredom. Oh, the irony. The lyrics to the song were:
Martin, M., Sadlo, G., & Stew, G. (2006) The phenomanon of boredom. Qualitative Research in Psychology, 3, 193-211.
The topic for this week is boredom. The article never really did give a clear definition for what boredom was; it only said that it is a poorly understood phenomenon. So, that left me wondering what it means to be bored. I found a quote by Leo Stein which says, "Boredom is an emptiness filled with insistance." This study on boredom related in the article stated that boredom for many people was "an extremely unpleasant feeling, possibly worse than any other." Really?? I found that interesting. Some said that it caused life to lose all meaning and purpose. I think we've got some extremists on our hands. However, I would agree with the description of boredom coming as a result of stress, agitation, restlessness, and entrapment, combined with lethargy. Along with these feelings, boredom was also described as an inability to attend or focus. This description perfectly describes my experience of working on my capstone this past week. But was I bored? I wouldn't have said so, but now I don't really know. The song, "Flowers on the Wall" by Dailey and Vincent is a good example of boredom. If you're interested, here are the lyrics:
I keep hearin' you're concerned about my happiness
But all that thought you're givin' me is conscience I guess
If I was walkin' in your shoes, I wouldn't worry none
While you 'n' your friends are worried about me I'm havin' lots of fun
[Chorus:]
Countin' flowers on the wall
That don't bother me at all
Playin' solitaire till dawn with a deck of fifty-one
Smokin' cigarettes and watchin' Captain Kangaroo
Now don't tell me I've nothin' to do
Last night I dressed in tails, pretended I was on the town
As long as I can dream it's hard to slow this swinger down
So please don't give a thought to me. I'm really doin' fine
You can always find me here, I'm havin' quite a time
[Chorus]
It's good do see you, I must go. I know I look a fright
Anyway my yes are not accustomed to this light
And my shoes are not accustomed to this hard concrete
So I must go back to my room and make my day complete
[Chorus]
This song most related to the portion of the article addressing strategies to overcome boredom. It states that the most common method used by people trying to overcome boredom was trying to find alternative things to do. Me? I tend to make food, clean, or dink around on my guitar when I'm bored. Not that I have any time to be bored. I'm in grad school for goodness sake.
Out of sheer curiosity and because I had no idea what it was, I actually went and looked up Captain Kangaroo on YouTube. If I had to describe it, I would have said it was like the '70's version of Mr. Roger's Neighborhood, and I'd argue that one would have to be pretty blasted bored to sit and watch it. However, interestingly enough, the little clip I watched included a bunch of stuffed animal puppets riding on a bus singing a song which I felt could easily be related to boredom. Oh, the irony. The lyrics to the song were:
In a lopsided ramshackle bus
we ride from day to day
we
bounce and we bump and we rattle a long
we rattle along on our way
Every year it’s
a hassle for us
to get from June to May
but somehow or other, by hook or by
crook
we rattle along on our way
Every time that we start to fall all apart
and we’re near
the end of our rope
a screwball comes through with a gimmick that’s new
and
our hearts go crazy with hope
We hop on our lopsided bus
and chase another day
as happy as
candles that shine on a cake
as gay as the bells on a sleigh
We rattle a long, we rattle along, we rattle along on our
way
We rattle a long, we rattle along, and try to find our way.
Sometimes I wonder if we are too often bored with our lives, whatever your definition of bored may be. We just rattle along on a lopsided bus until something new comes along and we are entertained for a little while. But most of the time, we go through the hum drum monotony of our lives and restlessly "chase another day" as we "try to find our way." I know I get pretty bored with my life sometimes. Funny how just because you're busier than Satan and never seem to run out of things to do, you can still be bored. The trick is learning to be "happy as candles that shine on a cake and gay as the bells on a sleigh" as we go through it all. The last sentence of the article really resonated with me. It says, "If we could learn to pay more attention both to ourselves and to our environment, learning to accept and appreciate the present moment, we might have richer lives." That is truth people, and it's something I need to do more. Appreciate the present moment. Count your blessings, not your problems. Then you'll never get bored :)
Martin, M., Sadlo, G., & Stew, G. (2006) The phenomanon of boredom. Qualitative Research in Psychology, 3, 193-211.
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