Lead Kindly Light

Lately I've had some really crazy sleep patterns. Not really sure why, but this morning I was wide awake and bushy-tailed at 5:30. That's pretty crazy early to get up on a Sunday morning when you have absolutely no reason to. But there I was. 

I love driving. I love to just get in a car... and go. Go somewhere I've never been, and not know where I'm going. It's liberating not to have to know. So that's what I did. Still wearing my pajamas, I slipped on some flip flops, grabbed my keys, and out the door I went. I decided to go toward the sunrise. 

Pocatello is great for the fact that if you just pick a road and go, eventually you'll end up driving through hills and valleys which are absolutely gorgeous. I love it. As I drove, my main goal was to be in the beautiful new streams of sunlight; however, I was surrounded by hills and the sun wasn't quite high enough yet to come out over the top of their shadows. I could always see pure sunlight in the distance, and I would think, "Not too much farther." But I would just catch a bit of it and then it was right back into the shadows. 

I started thinking that I just needed to get higher, and pretty soon I came upon a side road (gravel) which had a steep incline. Perfect! So, thinking I would be a little adventurous and do some off-roading, I laid into the gas and felt pretty hardcore as I went up this hill. Pretty soon I made it to the top, and, to my disappointment, found that I had just traveled up a very steep and treacherous gravel driveway. Sitting before me was an extremely run-down, old house surrounded by junk and rusty old vehicles. I fully expected an old, bearded man with three teeth to come out wearing a wife-beater and overalls, lift up a shotgun and yell, "Get off my property!" 

I quickly turned around and went back to the main road. 

As the road went on, it became very windy with sharp turns, and I couldn't always see where I was going. My patience and perseverance was soon rewarded though, and before long I had broken out of the shadows into beautiful, golden sunlight. I drove until I found a place I could pull off the road, and taking a blanket from the back of my car, climbed up the window shield to take a perch and soak it all in. The birds were singing, horses were in the pasture, dew glistened on the long grass, and it was just me and my thoughts. It was beautiful. I'm not sure where I was, but I could totally live there someday.

In a few hours I would be singing and playing "Lead Kindly Light" in our sacrament meeting, and as I sat there I realized just how much my little drive resembled the words of that song.

"Lead, kindly Light, amide the encircling gloom, lead Thou me on.
The night is dark, and I am far from home; lead Thou me on.
Keep Thou my feet; I do not ask to see
The distant scene; one step enough for me.

I was not every thus, nor prayed that Thou shouldst lead me on;
I loved to choose and see my path; but now lead Thou me on.
I loved the garish day, and, spite of fears,
Pride ruled my will. Remember not past years.

So long Thy power hath blessed me, sure it still will lead me on.
O;er moor and fen, o'er crag and torrent, till the night is gone,
And with the morn those angel faces smile, 
Which I have loved long since, and lost a while.

It is so important to follow the path that our Heavenly Father and his son, Jesus Christ, have laid out for us. I know sometimes it feels as though we're stuck in the shadows, and the road is windy, and we can't see where we're going... but that's okay. The reward is so great! And we'll get there someday! We just have to trust that when we get there, it will be more beautiful than would could have imagined, and we'll think, "Yeah, I could totally live here." 

Most importantly, we must not leave the path. Even thought it may seem more adventurous and you think it will get you to what you want faster, you may just find a dirty, beaten up house which potentially could have an old toothless man with a shotgun inside. 

The Lord's plan for us is so, so much sweeter and more rewarding than anything we could ever plan for ourselves. No matter what, if we love and stay true to the gospel, we will always be where we are meant to be. Whatever plan you had for yourself or wherever you think you were supposed to be right now, throw it out the window. If you are living up to your divine potential and working hard to become what the Savior would have you be, you are exactly where you are supposed to be right now. 

"When walking through the 'valley of the shadows,' always remember that a shadow is cast by a light." 
-H. K. Barclay

Never hesitate to trust the Lord. He knows what He's doing. Lead, kindly light.

Yours Truly